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Melissa Barker Answers the Proust Questionnaire


Melissa Barker. Photo by Meg Taintor.

Melissa Barker (Milena in Whistler in the Dark’s Family Stories) was most recently seen in Whistler in the Dark’s staged reading of Red Dog by John Greiner-Ferris. Other Whistler credits include The Europeans (staged reading) and The Bacchae. She has also performed with imaginary beasts; in two of their annual Winter Pantos, and was seen last summer in New Exhibition Room’s world premiere production Shh!. Melissa studied theatre at Suffolk University.

What is your definition of misery?
Being stuck in an elevator with Ann Coulter.

What is your greatest fear?
Drowning. Also being eaten by a raptor.

What was your first “real” job working in theatre?
I was in a community theatre production of Anything Goes when I was 12. I have tender memories of it.

Are you a good at waiting tables?
Very.

Which historical figure do you most identify with?
Annie Oakley

Who are your favorite heroes of theatre?
Gypsy Rose Lee, Mark Rylance, stagemanagers

Who are your favorite heroes in real life?
My mom. Seriously.

What do you consider the most overrated virtue?
Chastity. Patience is pretty lame as well.

What do you consider the most underrated virtue?
I’m not so good at virtue…Beauty maybe? Is that a virtue? I like pretty things.

Your favorite painter?
Roy Lichtenstein.

Your favorite musician?
This question makes my head explode. I’m listening to The Magnetic Fields while I write this…so…I like them.

Your favorite playwright?
I have an ever growing love of Howard Barker.

When and where were you happiest?
I’m happier these days then I have been in quite some time. So I guess that means I’m happiest in the here and now?

What do you most value in colleagues?
A sense of humor (preferably dark and twisted) and acceptance of the fact that I frequently over share inappropriate details of my life.

Is there a class in which you wish you had paid more attention?
Art History. And maybe math.

If you didn’t work in theatre, what would you do?
I’d be a piercer. Or maybe a rock star.

What do you consider your greatest achievement?
I’ll let you know when it happens!

What you’d like to be the world’s best at?
Thumb wrestling.

What book would you read more than once?
I read the Sandman series frequently. I embrace my nerdiness.

Who would play you in a movie of your life? Why?
Johnny Depp. What can’t that man play?

What sports teams do you follow?
None regularly, though I have tender feelings for the Red Sox.

Where would you like to spend a vacation?
Recently I’ve been thinking a lot about going to Seattle, but I could be convinced to sit on a beach somewhere tropical…and by convinced I mean who wants to take me somewhere tropical?

What car would you like to be seen driving around in?
‘64-1/2, convertible, “Rangoon Red”.

What book is currently on your nightstand?
The Once and Future King

If you could see a great production of a classic play, what would it be?
Tartuffe

If you could travel back in time to visit or live in any time in history, when would it be?
I’d like to live in that 1930’s sort of romanticized old Hollywood world. Though I wouldn’t object to a quick stop in ancient Rome…the fun sexy part, not the bloody, stabby, murdery part.

What actor will see in any project they do?
Curt Klump, Scott Sweatt, Sarah Newhouse…so many others.

Family Storiesnews wire
Whistler In The Dark • whistlerinthedark.com

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